Due Diligence for readers – new ad categories allowed per Google optimization suggestions ….

    As you may know, we here at the Pick deny advertisers from Google’s ad-universe for a variety of reasons–

  • Ads for any product or service that is a scam or appears “scammy” (certain online universities, too-good-to-be-true and the like …)
  • Ads containing visually unappetizing imagery or text (pictures of foot fungus, or weight-loss “comparisons” or “shaming” pix = image of a grossly obese & scantily clad person, yech!)
  • Organizations that interfere with the publisher’s morals or ethics (stalker apps, Penn State ….)
  • Any product that disguises itself as a clickable portion of MY PAGE (despite my compliance and strict adherence to adequate labeling/positioning/sectioning away from legit content…)

The featured image (above) shows a snippet of data you won’t be able to read unless you are a Google client, employee or Ad-partner (like us!). In it, I’ve continued to deny online gambling ads. Gambling is by far the worst and most damaging — to self and those close — of all the addictions. Worse even, than cigarettes or alcohol. Today, I’ve allowed “downloadables” which I presume is “freemium” content, like Clash of Clans or Candy Crush. “South Park” did an episode on this, entitled “freemium” [if memory serves] if that word sounds like guttural French to you, well, it kinda is, but if it MEANS no more that something guttural in a dead language, I recommend Trey Parker & Matt Stone’s take on it to explain. I see no ethical issue [downloads are usually free, the extra content, levels, truncated wait-time is available for purchase if you are wealthy, extremely impatient or extremely gullible ….] As election 2016 approaches, being a media outlet, I’ve opted IN to “political ads” if you’ve seen my awful caricatures, listened to Bill’s rants on TapCast or read my #RNC2016 coverage & editorial, you’ll know that this writer is not a fan of Trump…but this is ‘muhricuh…dammit! I’ll defend his right to plaster “Make America Great AGAIN” all over ever single ad unit on this site if he wants…that’s free speech 101.
If you ever see an ad that offends you, is in poor tastes, looks “scammy,” or represents an organization, institution you despise,take the time to leave a comment. If we agree I’ll ban the shit out of it, promise!
to do list for this site

  • update to wp 4.6 (must backup custom php 1st)
  • posts – [with original artwork!] re- election, the economy, career choicers, investment projections, fresh ideas and the two new languages we are hip-dep in Swift and R
  • design – ongoing [wip] updates
  • learn to create a child theme + tutorial
  • more regular and higher quality podcasts, possibly including original music [stay tuned!]

Orange-u-glad-u frequent a site where the publisher goes out of his way, not only to keep content fresh, original, timely, interesting and worth that 15mins/day where you have nuthin better to do, but keeps the site secure, updated, continually upgrades design, appends how-to’s regardin’ CMS and front-end-webdev where applicable…but is also are excruciatingly anal about 3rd party content. Hopefully the political ads and “downloadables” are not too ugly — all ads are subject to ban, same with blacklisting of the organization/companies they bleed from at any time for any reason. here we go kids, below is a footer style ad that ostensibly will not offend your (or MY) delicate sensibilities.




*****update – the 1st published version of this post contained a poorly-drawn picture of a human foot with big nasty looking toes, therefore the advertiser was susequently banned, sorry if you had to see that. The biz seemed legit, but no ugliness on my aesthetically-pleasing site consarnit!!!!

HAPPY LABOUR DAY – PS CHRIS W. IS FOR HIRE! GET AT him USING THE COMMENTS, VIA SM OR text the BUSINESS LINE IF YOU ARE LUCKY & POSESS IT

SEO Marketing Scams, WordPress Developer Scams and much more…

The more I soak my dumb face in the development of this site, the more I get into …pretty much every single aspect of it. I was just fine with having a nice place to keep an online journal…now it’s getting noticed. A bunch of plugins failed when they bumped to v4…was that two weeks ago? Anyway, I fixed the problems but for some reason, I wanted to see if I could make it look a little cooler. I’ve been customizing the theme I settled on, testing a few scripts, a few days ago I started using cascading style and TODAY, I dug up a book my uncle gave me on Web Design – “WEB DESIGN IN A NUTSHELL” by Jennifer Niederst. It’s about 560 pages and I read every damn word. That’s just the kinda guy I am …there’s so many possibilities different things I can do with this technology I’ve buried myself up to the neck in it for months and I only just realized Ive hardly scratched the surface of what all the creative energy and traffic and readers could lead to. I can feel a synergy building. This is the most exposure I’ve ever had. I graduated at the top of journalism class, Cal Poly’s own 2003-2004 Outstanding Senior Broadcaster. I’d quit the Mustang Daily in 02, the editors only published my sports coverage, features and restaurant reviews…I turned in hard news all the time, covering every thing I could get my hands on…the students had a lot of problems with the community, The university was overcrowded and they were not just failing the students on parking and class availability…we had several women who’d been raped an murdered, a VERY disproportionate amount, The police were abusive and the fraternities (it was considered uncool-“paying for friends” is what we called it) were using GHB to rape women. One of those houses kept a bottle of “Faderade” in the fridge, which was, I suppose kept readily available? In case you unexpectedly need to rape someone? Just a sip was enough to turn someone into a corpse for 12 hours. One morning…one of them boys got up all hungover and dehydrated. He pounded the whole bottle. His roomate found him a few hours later when he woke up.

Another toothpick.

I had a line on everything going on, I wrote stories about all of it. Those editors would never publish my good stuff though…so I spent the last 2 of my 6 years at 93.1 KCPR. They let me cover whatever I wanted to. They even made me the News Director. I was there when riots broke out at our big Mardi Gras blowout…hidin in a friends garage from the police who rolling with those things that look like tanks…on bullhorns telling everyone to get the fuck out. Then they tear gassed the whole block and when I tried to run back to my studio I got shot by a bean-bag gun. By then I was interning at the local Clear Channel Affiliate I produced morning news and call screened the afternoon talk show. For the scandals they never published in the Daily, KCPR and KVEC let it all out….every monday they wanted to know sort of shit I got myself mixed up in…they encouraged it. Cuz that’s what I do. Whatever sorts of shit is going on? I get ALLLLLLLL mixed up in it. Maybe that’s why I cab still write a decent clip. I been mixed up in every sort of shit you can think of….and I got a lot to say about it.

There arent too many jobs in SoCal, or anywhere for writer/reporters/commentators….now I got this WordPress thing goin on. I’m not backing away from this growing readership that’s priceless to me. I want more—so I’m giving YOU more.

  • elegant lean process improvement
  • cost-saving (cost-free) techniques to improve the design, look, feel and function of YOUR WordPress Web site
  • Exposing the SEO scams
  • WordPress Consulting fraud, Phishing, Spammer Militia carpet-bombings
  • even LinkedIn is saturated by WP attack scams

I got tools for user-friendly, cross-platform, browser independent Web design, Simple concepts to grow an audience organically, ease in both engineering and presentation of creative content.

it’s becoming exponentially more accessible while the cost plummets

What we have today- is a temporal disconnect between “Web Design” “attracting visitors,” “Technical problems,” and “too complicated,” “no way I could learn to build a Web site….” THIS is why emerging technologies and tools attract motivated, successful artists but sadly, with that comes the morally bankrupt. Beware of those who now offer “Expert Web Development” and other assistance YOU DON”T NEED.

This is how to sell snake-oil in 2014….feed the fear of society. MY WORDS are as powerful as ever. They offer a means to the truth. Soon we will break down the online treachery that pervades all corners of the Net. You will see how it’s done from the inside and Domains, Servers and soon Actual Names of people who identify an emergent technology with a potential to give untold freedom of expression to the greatest number; human progress in its purest form—and use it for poorly planned and frequently profitless ethically malicious ways to make a few bucks.

To those who would seek to destroy a technology that provides not just an outlet, but a loyal readership I respect and am inspired by loyalty to not only write, but dive head-first into design….as the 4th Estate it will be ME who puts exposes who you are, what you do and how you do it. I can’t stop you, but you can’t stop me. I watch the cops, the criminals, the normies, the freaks. I watch the blithering fool on the corner and the million dollar housewife on Lexapro. I watch the watchers. There is no group, class, business, subject, theory or subject I don’t keep my eye on. You’ve caught the attention of an investigator, software engineer, hustler with not a shred of fear left in him.
“SEO Optimization Consultants” and “WordPress Solution Providers”are on notice…I got a story WIP list a mile long but the more they attack, the higher up they get. I’m here to help others… using WP to help your small business? I can help you….but I’m not tryin to take your money…I mean hey, maybe the trend continues for me and I get noticed by the right person…maybe somebody out there with a big site, magazine, station, podcast, vlog, youtube….maybe the next time the publishing/broadcast business opens up the books…it could be ME that gets straightened out you never know.

Meantime I got a nice big audience to cater to and artistically that’s all I ever wanted. So thank you dear reader you know how I feel…ahhhh fuck it….you’re the reason I write, you motivate me I’m starting to get my life back. Since 2011 I been laid off, my best friend has a brain aneurysm in a church, right in front of the alter, my fiance’ succumbs to cancer and then POW! I black out, I’m losin’ my mind, I end up in jail…I get hit by a car. I don’t even believe this shit as I’m writing I swear it MUST HAVE happened to someone else. NO WAY I survived all of that.

I can walk again. I got all my teeth fixed, I lost a bunch of weight. I makin some money, All up in the club…I’m lookin all smooth…..”I’m Barack Obama. I’m the president. I’m hittin’ that ass!” credit to Leon Black helpin me take today’s post out out with a pop That’s right. Cuz I gets mine!!!!

A new sponsor:

Chris Welke: a writer’s bio…

The following is a draft of my writer/ed/proofer professional autobiography, in excruciatingly brief detail…it’s like saying JFK’s dad was into politics, so he got into it too, did ok, won some elections, became president, got shot. Then died. Enjoy dear reader I’ve been at it all day, but you all know how much I love to write to you…and besides, what better topic is there than…me? (I would put a winky face, but I agree with Larry David those symbols are “[part of] the destruction of the English language,” so I’m weening off emoticons….IS THAT OK WITH YOU???? huh……w…w…wha??? whut?)

It is standard operating procedure at major metropolitan newspapers to write stories at no more than an eighth-grade level. The same goes for Web sites and the majority of printed material. The majority of readers in North America will find anything written at a HS level or higher difficult to understand. In second grade, I began reading Stephen King novels, I’m a longtime fan of Roland, the Last Gunslinger and his infinite quest for The Dark Tower. My parents are both teachers and nurtured my love of reading by allowing me access to the same books adults were reading. My second grade teacher checked in on our reading progress by opening  books to a random page and saying, “what is going on on this page?” I was reading “Cujo” at the time, she happened upon a page that forced me to describe an especially horrific revenge scene that plumbs the depths of male depravity…My teacher strongly advised that I not be allowed to read adult novels, but my parents knew that by the time I was seven, to have me read any novels NOT for adults would waste my time, not expand my vocabulary and even the Scholastic teen-reader type books were a waste of money because I could read a 200 page book in one sitting. That’s the kind of voracious reader I am. I do not own a television. I prefer the magic and elegance of the written word. 

I finished HS in the 98th percentile statewide (a cross product of SAT scores, AP and college-prep coursework, extra-curricular (all music), volunteer work and GPA). This granted me entrance to the Cal Poly San Luis Obispo College of Engineering, where I stayed until I decided I wanted to be a writer/editor, not a code-writer. I advanced quickly through the College of Liberal Arts, Working at The Mustang Daily as a reporter, KCPR as a reporter, then News Director and interning at KVEC, the local Clear Channel Affiliate. Through dedication and a passion for storytelling, I graduated at the top of my Journalism class in 2004, winning The Ed Zuchelli Award for Outstanding Senior Broadcaster (2003-2004) and The Dept. Chair’s Award for Leadership in Journalism (2003-2004).
I worked as a professional brass musician for a year after graduation in the SF bay area and returned home when the gigs started to slow down. I took a job as a process server. Frequently the lawyers I worked for needed to investigate and occasionally track down the people they wanted to sue, often with little information to go on. Not a safe job, but a fun one for me…I love to research, investigate, solve problems and find people who do not want to be found. Private investigations are the good journalists’ stock-in-trade. Gas prices effectively voided this as a profitable job by early 2006.
Shortly thereafter, I found myself contracted to work at Metagenics, Inc. Makers of professional quality dietary supplements. I worked my way up from temporary assembly-line laborer to a litany of middle-mgmt titles including Purchasing, Scheduling, Assembly line lead, mechanic, technician, QA/QC technician, Private Label Expediter and one promotion later I traded in my lab coat for a suit where I was given the honorable title of Label Routing Coordinator, responsible for over 2000 SKUs, most of which would route for a variety of reasons on a regular basis (formula changes, Marketing redesigns, Sales copy revisions, Legal/Regulatory Affairs changes). I sat in between the Ops director and the Marketing Director.
A major routing, such as that for a new product or reformulation would need to route through every department imaginable, think of it as each department being the spokes on a wheel and ME being the axle on which that wheel turned. Once I’d mediated, negotiated and settled on a finalized label, it was me who signed off on the final draft and could place the PO for x-thousand labels to be printed in my capacity as Sr. Proofreader and Publishing Scheduler and Planner. That was a great honor and made the best use of my talents, exp. and education. To my knowledge I have never approved one label, template, marketing brochure or Web page with a single error on it.
My brain zeroes in on spelling errors, grammar problems, run-on sentences, punctuation errors, poor organization, poor structure of prose and the like. I find mistakes daily in the LA Times and it frustrates me, even my beloved Dark Tower books are littered with egregious errors. Editing and proofing is my strongest professional suit by a wide margin. I’m very left-brained, so editing comes easier than writing. That’s why I chose Journalism…it is hard to create a new story, but easy, fascinating and fun to take stories from real life and report them in a uniquely informative, comprehensive yet concise and clear manner. All the fiction I write in my spare time is based on real events from my life. All the characters are based on real people or a conglomeration of two or three personalities. Much like Robert Crumb or F. Scott Fitzgerald, the male lead in my stories is usually me, or some kind of abstraction of me.
Whether you are writing a screenplay, book, novella, short story, column, news blurb, blog or photo-caption, I can and WILL help you – because that is what I love to do…help other writers realize their full potential. Let’s create something great together. -cw

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